You can’t pee on your problems to solve them.

But there are other things you can do.

I once had a (virgin) mojito, and it lead to the most excruciating pain of my life. I still have nightmares about lime, soda water and sugar.

I was 12 and in Cuba for a family vacation. The great thing about Cuban-all-inclusive-resorts is the ability to exploit the free drinks. I had lots (don’t take this the wrong way, I was 12).

As you may infer, I eventually had to pee. We were on the beach, and the hotel room was too far. There were…